Sonnets From Other Lives: Emil

Did I say it didn’t used t’be this way?
That sounds stupid—I mean never is
is it? I know that time brings things to change
& now it looks like I changed into this
shabby piece of work you see before you.
Naw—I know in most ways I ain’t bad.
Tried t’do the best that I could do
with whatever meager talents that I had.
Didn’t see this comin tho’ no way.
Wasn’t all ambitious—no—but still
a body can’t look forward to a day
when just bein alive can make you ill
but there it is & there I am as well.
Ain’t no heaven but leastways it ain’t hell